Page 27. That’s all.
Thank you for the birthday well wishes, and I hope you’re having a happy holiday season! I was thinking about running the next livestream on Wednesday December 26 at 7 pm CST – anyone interested?
O Human Star
by Blue Delliquanti
MORE OF BLUE’S STUFF
I’m a little lost here. The drama seems a little out of left field. But at least Titus looks nice?
Completely agreed. Like, Titus was all quiet and spoke to Gimel on the side and everything. It’s not like they were making a big deal out of it for their friend to react like this. The drama just kinda came out of there full blast and doesn’t feel like it fits the progression.
The drama makes sense in relation to past scenes with Titus and their friends, they’ve talked with Sulla about how the other kids don’t respect their name or pronouns. I recommend re-reading the scenes where Sulla first hung out with Titus and the others!
It’s kind of like drama in real life. Character development? We know very little about this teen-squad, and this is giving us some hints at the dynamic. Seems like Erika may have wanted to date Titus, but didn’t accept them as being a non-binary gender so that along with perhaps other things made it so Titus didn’t want to date/keep dating Erika. That’s just a guess anyhow… Totally explains the unexpected drama. Friendship with crushes/exes is like that—especially when you are a teenager.
But the book isn’t about that. At its base, its about Alastor walking back into HIS ex’s life with a legacy that isn’t his own to greet him. Their drama was made interesting because of how little we know about this Al, and how much we DO know about the life the real one truly lived. Its an AI being forced to pay for the crimes of a dead man while also repeating the benefits he did not deserve, all while his lover finally cracks from the life hes built when he forced to leave his love behind.
I started reading in chapter 2, and I was so excited to see them get back together… But now we’re stuck in a subplot about human teen angst that comes pretty much out of absolute nowhere. I don’t think I would have minded as much if the Al/Bren parallels were more apparent earlier on, but they aren’t. If Brendan overheard and had a breif flashback to Al and his relationship, then I would accept it a little easier as a sideplot, but we don’t get that. Its just Erika being pissed off that Titus is making eggs and getting along with Sulla better? Why? Why is that needed?
I rather think that *we* don’t reeeally know what this is about. This is a story Blue is telling us, and I think there’s a reason they added what they added. The details probably add up to something.
I get the frustration, I really do, but it seems like you think you’re owed certain narrative choices, and you’re not. None of us are.
I disagree. It’s all variations on a theme and what’s going on with Titus fits in well with that.
I don’t feel owed anything. I’m just used to how the beginning of the story flowed and the story it seemed to be telling. This new drama is, well, just that. Its new and its drama.
We won’t know the full story Blue is telling us for some time, but this scene is very much consistent with the themes we’ve seen so far. This isn’t only the story of Al and Brendan – although I’m interested in that story, too – it’s also the story of Sula, and Titus is very much part of that.
“O Human Star” has been about identity, and gender identity is very much a part of that. Is the Al we’ve been following really Al; he seems functionally human, but how far does that go? What does it say about Al that the teenaged version of him – one unburdened by the social expectations he grew up with – identifies as, and ultimately chose to be, female? Is Sula a more authentic version of Al? Is Al not cisgender?
Yes, this book started off looking like a love story about two gay cis-men, but it’s been clear since we met Sula that it was going to also be about other things. On this page, we’re seeing into the difficulty Titus having their gender respected by someone they’ve known for a long time; the fact of how long they’ve known each other actually makes it harder for Erika. (The previous page also implies some painful stuff about just how much Titus might’ve struggled.)
Right now, we’re seeing this through the lens of Titus, but this is a question that may directly impact Al-and-Brendan. I’d have to go back and re-read, since I don’t recall whether Al and Titus have ever actually spoken. If they ever talk about gender, things might get clearer for him. Sula is just sort of effortlessly female, but Titus represents someone for whom gender identity has involved more conflict. That could have a lot to do with how Al ultimately sees himself, and how he ultimately relates to Brendan.
I think it can (and is) about many things. Arguing (versus discussing) about what it is seems pointless as it really depends on the person who’s reading it. I bet 10 different people here could find 10 different themes/meanings, and you know? That’s totally okay. In fact, that is better than okay. It’s wonderful!
What I see in it is a strong theme of learning to love yourself, and that is beautiful at any age (including post-death—apparently ;) ).
I think I understand how Titus’ friend feels.
Unfortunately, it’s impossible for me to say why because I can’t translate what I want to say due to Titus’ pronouns, which I have a hard time with because my native language uses male pronouns for neutral gender and I still have a hard time trying to convey that into English without sounding bad.
And I’m a friggin’ translator.
Sorry for the rant.
Except that’s how teenagers can be. Drama often comes out of left field when one is awash with hormones.
Oh, wow! Does Erika have feelings for Titus or is she just being a concerned friend? I’m guessing it’s the first given she goes on about how they’ve known one another so long after pointing out how short a time they’ve known Sulla. Unrequited feelings?
oof did u somehow just sum up the whole genderqueer experience in one comic page b/c b r a v o
Right??? Sometimes it’s easier to share a new understanding of your identity w/ someone who hasn’t got too many prior misconceptions…
Complete with cis tears in the comments, it’s amazing
I know rite!? All the normative tears in the comments. People are trying to argue with them… but being able to place them as cis tears… makes me less confused and frustrated and more happy. Thanks for that.
Also. This page is so good.
Fascinating! This is the secondary plotline, so it totally makes sense to me that we had to resolve the big cliffhanger before there was a chance to catch up with Titus’s gender stuff. I’d wondered if anyone was going to call Titus on chasing a person they’d barely met. It’s not inconsequential that they opened up about it to Sulla immediately and that this was unprecedented in their life! We’ve already seen that Erika is the most loudmouthed of the bunch – and, if the experience in the restaurant is any indication, the most likely to push something away for being unfamiliar and take refuge in bland stuff she already understands (cereal). Titus is throwing shade a bit for sure, but the only way the introduction of Sulla has thrown things off for the group is by giving Titus a secure foothold for being themself. Of course Titus is going to like that, and chase it, and renegotiate their friendships even if really old and established. It would be a lot weirder if Sulla made a bunch of friends based on so little and no one questioned it.
Titus and Erika… Titus is Vietnamese and speaks the language with the server at the pho place, but their relationship is imbalanced enough that Erika doesn’t even think about complaining that Vietnamese food is strange or gross to her and praising Titus for taking her to “normal” ie WASP restaurants that serve her “normal” food like chicken sandwiches rather than banh mi. That was ugly at the time, and a lot worse now that we know she’s been close with Titus since they were so young and she still considers their culture alien and objectionable. Titus has been doing a lot of suppression of their identity in their friendship with Erika, not just in terms of gender, and it’s nice to see them starting to stand up for themselves instead of trying to smooth things over.
blue wanted us to see that (at least one of) erika’s fist(s) is bawled up
to emphasize that erika’s.. ..not quite done with this discussion, if i had to guess.
(are we going back to the present tense soon?)
yeah that clenched fist does not bode well for this convo
let’s see what happens next!
You know what is interesting? Even though Erika is clearly worried/jealous, she still calls Sulla as a *girl* despite the fact it was revealed Sulla is a synthetic being just hours before. She doesn’t even bring up that Sulla is a synthetic—even though that could easily be turned into an argument why she thinks Titus doesn’t belong with her. This is ironic given it appears she didn’t respect Titus’ request to be gendered as they asked. This is a really interesting detail of how prejudice can come in so many forms. A person can be pro-equality one way and bigoted another. It’s part of why I’ve been nervous about joining an LGBT group.
At least to me, Erika sounds less bigoted and more angry at the fact that she and her friends have been as loyal as they can with Titus for years, but Titus hasn’t reciprocated to what she percieves to be a heavy effort to internalise their new identity, all of that while this new people is cheered by doing almost nothing in comparison.
Yes, it is pretty self-centered when looked from the outside, but I can see how this could sound borderline reasonable from the perspective of a friend that struggles to reconcile old stereotypes with their friend’s “new” identity.
All in all, they are flawed and still too young people.
It is bigoted, though. Maybe not in the sense she’s spray-painting swastikas, screaming anti-gay effigies, or burning crosses, but it shows she is not respecting Titus’ identity and that is anti-trans. A person can be a sad/hurt/concerned, and still be a bigot towards the person you care about at the same time.
I may not be deliberate or come from a place of direct hate, but then again the most enduring bigotry is the kind that isn’t meant to be malicious, but is caused by inexperience/ignorance and/or fear of the unknown. We’ve been seeing this a lot in our community (we live in suburbs made from farmlands), and it’s be become so tiresome we’re considering moving. It’s not just been directed at the LGBT community either, but people of color and women as well. I’ve seen it from locals I considered “friends.” People who are “concerned” and “mean well.” That has been the hardest.
In a way, it reminds me of Brendan getting upset that Sulla felt more comfortable with talking to Al about her dreams despite only knowing him a short time. I think Brendan walking in to see the two youngins in a similar situation might help him better understand his own?
Ah, so that’s how it is. Makes a lot of sense, and does make me wonder where Titus’ other friends stand. Judging by their words here, Erika isn’t the only one who has been an issue on that front.
I love the side stuff with Titus and Erica. We’ve seen it coming for a while. I think maybe Erica has another outburst coming about a FLYING MAGICAL GIRL…
I love that Titus doesn’t let themself get caught up in this guilt trip. I understand that Erica might be feeling jealous that Titus is forming a new relationship (friendship or otherwise idk) with someone who’s still kind of a stranger, but… I’ve also had friends who’ve handled their jealousy this way; by sulking about it and asking “but what about ME” when… the new friendship isn’t detrimental at all to the old one.
I totally understand the jealousy. I’ve felt it too, and I’m not trying to harsh on Erica for feeling feelings. I’m not explaining this well at all XD I just really appreciate that Titus calmly explains their feelings on the matter without reflecting Erica’s drama back at her.
Me, too! It gets very old when so-called friends claim they are “concerned,” but their feelings are really all about their own issues. If people actually were open about those kinds of things instead of passive aggressively playing it as a guilt trip wrapped in “concern,” it’d be so much easier to navigate relationships.
my friend recommended me this comic and i read the whole thing within a day. ugh it’s sooooo goooooood. also all this trans stuf??? A+++
titus literally looks like me and it was very jarring to see them at first. heck we’re both afab nb!! the fuck!! i’m over the moon with this character. not only that they look like me, identify the same way, they’re also not just a nonverbal side character?? an actual love interest???? shut up. this is too good.
and the whole storyline just keeps on getting better and better! keep up the good work!!!!!!
Listening is hard, especially when you already know somebody.