Page 76. And scene.
Thanks for your continued support of O Human Star, especially during this past year. The next year will see a lot of stuff happening in the story, and you can continue to support me through Patreon for bonus sketches, PDFs, and livestreams. But I really appreciate all of my readers, so thanks for sticking around. <3
Well. Something’s up.
“Aren’t you tired?”
Of course he’s tired, Brendan.
but you k’now what isn’t tired at all?
his damn anxiety, which is draining his life away – literally.
Geez B.
WOW, Brendan. Way to shame Al for not being ready to go public.
STRESS AND REPRESS
Arrrrggghh.
At first I was like, “Oh gosh that’s a full blown panic attack right there. Brendan what’s wrong with you if you won’t hold him I will – ” then I remembered his cause of death, and this scene just got ten times worse. D:
Not yet! remember when he died he only had a ‘stache not the full on beard! not yet!
It could be an early manifestation of the symptoms? As I mentioned down below I’m not sure if it is an acute-onset or slow-onset disease.
…I must have missed something, I thought he died of an injury not an illness
I knew it. Dang Brenden…what the heck. Just because he does not want to have sex in a place where anyone can walk in on them, and in a place he considers his safe zone, does not mean he is ashamed of you darnit!
That.
This is pretty poorly veiled emotional manipulation, Brendan.
I am like, mad hoping this is not one of the scenes preceding the first few pages!! I have not forgotten about that note to Al taped to the pillow
Also GDI BRENDAN your word choice is so hurtful!!!!!!!!!! also everything else.
I like this scene a lot, it’s insightful both in the honesty of Blue’s writing and characterization-wise.
I have a feeling this is that “so the last thing you remember is…” that Brendan was talking about. And while this is ice cold, I honestly can’t blame him for saying that. They never had an honest to god conversation about Al’s feelings, and that really needs to happen. I think this is a case of Brendan jumping to conclusions because he thinks he knows what Al is thinking.
It’s easy to forget how young Past!Brendan is. At that age you’re very sensitive to perceived rejection, and a bit self absorbed.
I don’t think it was that soon yet? But then again I haven’t been great at keeping track of the timeline……will have to go back and fourth several times to check. (Also I know next to nothing about the onset of Goodpasture’s)
Oh Al
I’ve been Brendan and I’ve been Al. Neither was a comfortable fit. This is such a gripping story… thanks, Blue!
oh, man. It’s hard to be in love with someone whose issues you have barely begun to get a glimpse of.
Aw daaaaamn. I know where Brendan’s coming from but… Poor Al. :[
I imagine being told to “grow some balls” also could bring up some pretty scarring memories of enforced hypermasculinity…
omg no ihave a bad feelin g about al coughing aahh
Everyone is attacking Brendan and making him look like a bad guy, but he has a point. Al didn’t have a problem risking the secrecy at a conference full of people, but when Brendan does the same suddenly he’s in the wrong when they actually have more privacy in the work place.
But I’m sure that Al isn’t trying to be cold towards him, but he doesn’t want to worry Brendan with the cough or something along those lines.
Just my theory. Probably not sound but just making my mark. Beautiful comic, it’s really emotional and full of so much. I love it, especially when Al has a beard c:
Wholly inappropriate for this moment, but Al’s treasure trail. Turns. Me. On.
Good eye, Blue.
I always meant to say… I love and appreciate the role that autoimmune disease plays in OHS. Partly because you never really see autoimmune diseases in media, where it doesn’t fit neatly into the cultural narrative we tend to have about disease (disease is an invasion; you and your body can fight it; survivors “beat” their disease). It works so nicely, though, with this story, where so much of what Al and the others do is an autoimmunity–a gesture of self-protection that is so excessive or toxic that the protection itself becomes self-destructive. This page in particular articulates that so well.
aahh I just love this so much, thanks Blue. It gives me so much to think about.
Ohhhhh, dammit! I feel so much for them both! I would be so angry, just like Brendan, to be so soundly rejected after I was trying to romance/praise someone! (It’s a youthful, immature reaction, but I was there once and I totally understand.) I’m old enough not to immediately act on it, but it would still huuuuuuuurt.
Hello Blue! Love your comic, been reading it since Al found old Brendan. Forgive me if if I’m wrong but, is it posible that the thumb in the right hand is in the wrong side?
You’re right, that why it still wasn’t looking quite right to me! I’ve uploaded a tweaked version of the page.
:-)
you know there is still a lot of Red Story that we have not seen?
which would likely include, several other instances of alastair’s “rejecting” brendan
i’m not wont to vilify brennie — at least not right away — either: as i, too, am taken aback that al would have this kind of reaction
though, to be fair, allie already started sweating before bren had propositioned his daddy bear — so (ostensibly) brendan was not the direct trigger of whatever Episode al’s about to endure
Holy cow! This isn’t gonna end well! D:
Dear god. The feels. It is like watching a the train wreak in slow motion. We see the signs and know our boys don’t. All I want to do is scream at them to get Al to the doctor. I see the next few flashbacks ten times more painful, especially since Brendan didn’t know Al was sick. I can only imagine the guilt. Or perceived guilt since it wasn’t till after Al’s death he knew what really happened.
Brendan that is a toxic attitude to have and very manipulative. No means no.
I CAN’T BELIEVE WE WENT FROM SUPOER HOT MAKEOUT TO THIS IN JUST ONE PAGE
actually yes i can believe it because it’s completely coherent, but ow, my heart
A good documentary that probably explains the stress that Al is going through: The Mask You Live In
It can be found on YouTube though it does require a fee. I really enjoy seeing how you portray these characters, when they are kids, younger, and older.
So the stress, from hiding, and from all this new work, that’s what kicked Al’s condition into overdrive, huh?