Wow! As someone who’s had a difficult childhood and is watching my own child grow up healthy, this really resonates for me.
However, this is such a conflicting page. Brendan is probably healing and so many of the things he says about Sulla are correct, but at the same time he’s projecting terribly upon Al. Given Al is dead, one could argue there’s no harm in it. But at the same time? You have to wonder how it impacts the relationship between Sulla and Brendan. Does Brendan really see her as her own person or is Brendan treating Sulla as an extension to make himself feel less guilty about the way he talked to Al before he died? Someone else to “fix” instead of facing his own demons.
Also, given the fact we know Al (or at least a version of him) will come back to life later, it is hard not to find it further complicated. Is this scene supposed to be apologetic, forgiving, or is it actually disrespectful given Brendan never really seemed to be patient enough to get to know Al—nor used healthy communication when they had disagreements?
Deep, deep stuff. The characters and story are so powerful for this comic, and this is why I love it!
I think he does! By this point Brendan has been raising Sulla for over a decade — that’s plenty of time to get used to the idea that she’s a different person. A lot of that might be unconscious, but I think the discussion with Luce about Tsade probably brought it to the forefront.
There’s so much to this and so many directions it could take. Blows my mind how something that is completely SciFi has such a firm grasp on human reaction, flaws, and behavior—even through its main character who technically is not a flesh and blood human (but in all other ways is—even compared to other AIs in the story).
It’s sad, but somehow reassuring: As life circumstances and that elusively little spark, personality, inevitably will differ, even an identical clone won’t replace the person it will formed after completely.
In the same way identical twins may share many astonishing simularities, and a deep bond, but are completely different persons. Well done!
It’s fascinating. When Al suddenly walks back in intact, Brendan’s had plenty of time to reflect on how different Sulla ended up (I mean ‘open and joyous’ as much as I mean the gender stuff). He’s had three years to wonder what happened to Al in childhood, and to try not to repeat the things he can’t imagine that could have led Al to be so withdrawn and mercurial and neurotic. And then Al reappears unexpectedly – and before long, with a relatively minor incitement, Brendan lets loose with a vicious internal rant he’d probably developed over time about how he’d become determined not to let Sulla turn into Al.
As another fictional character once said, “I am my scars.”
Al was the person who resulted from his own life’s experiences, good or bad. Brendan never really accepted that person.
The little subtle taking the old pictures down of the not-Sulla is a nice touch (since you can see the old picture of not-Sulla the page before this one being taken down). This page is full of feels but I love this for Brendan accepting (or working on) accepting who Sulla is now. Especially since he’s using the correct pronouns that she would want him to. Even if he’s talking to Al/Al’s picture.
Unfair to Al, probably yeah, since Brendan needs to work through stuff still – but I see this as him coming to terms with it.
I’m binge rereading this and this struck me as a nice circle back to a way early page when they were coming up with the idea for the emulator. Copy the brain and anything from that point on will be different from the original. Brendan is finally understanding that instead of wishing for his lover back.
Wow! As someone who’s had a difficult childhood and is watching my own child grow up healthy, this really resonates for me.
However, this is such a conflicting page. Brendan is probably healing and so many of the things he says about Sulla are correct, but at the same time he’s projecting terribly upon Al. Given Al is dead, one could argue there’s no harm in it. But at the same time? You have to wonder how it impacts the relationship between Sulla and Brendan. Does Brendan really see her as her own person or is Brendan treating Sulla as an extension to make himself feel less guilty about the way he talked to Al before he died? Someone else to “fix” instead of facing his own demons.
Also, given the fact we know Al (or at least a version of him) will come back to life later, it is hard not to find it further complicated. Is this scene supposed to be apologetic, forgiving, or is it actually disrespectful given Brendan never really seemed to be patient enough to get to know Al—nor used healthy communication when they had disagreements?
Deep, deep stuff. The characters and story are so powerful for this comic, and this is why I love it!
I think he does! By this point Brendan has been raising Sulla for over a decade — that’s plenty of time to get used to the idea that she’s a different person. A lot of that might be unconscious, but I think the discussion with Luce about Tsade probably brought it to the forefront.
There’s so much to this and so many directions it could take. Blows my mind how something that is completely SciFi has such a firm grasp on human reaction, flaws, and behavior—even through its main character who technically is not a flesh and blood human (but in all other ways is—even compared to other AIs in the story).
/cry
Oof, My heart…
It’s sad, but somehow reassuring: As life circumstances and that elusively little spark, personality, inevitably will differ, even an identical clone won’t replace the person it will formed after completely.
In the same way identical twins may share many astonishing simularities, and a deep bond, but are completely different persons. Well done!
Gonna cry now.
It’s fascinating. When Al suddenly walks back in intact, Brendan’s had plenty of time to reflect on how different Sulla ended up (I mean ‘open and joyous’ as much as I mean the gender stuff). He’s had three years to wonder what happened to Al in childhood, and to try not to repeat the things he can’t imagine that could have led Al to be so withdrawn and mercurial and neurotic. And then Al reappears unexpectedly – and before long, with a relatively minor incitement, Brendan lets loose with a vicious internal rant he’d probably developed over time about how he’d become determined not to let Sulla turn into Al.
I’M NOT CRYING YOU’RE CRYING
As another fictional character once said, “I am my scars.”
Al was the person who resulted from his own life’s experiences, good or bad. Brendan never really accepted that person.
The little subtle taking the old pictures down of the not-Sulla is a nice touch (since you can see the old picture of not-Sulla the page before this one being taken down). This page is full of feels but I love this for Brendan accepting (or working on) accepting who Sulla is now. Especially since he’s using the correct pronouns that she would want him to. Even if he’s talking to Al/Al’s picture.
Unfair to Al, probably yeah, since Brendan needs to work through stuff still – but I see this as him coming to terms with it.
I’m binge rereading this and this struck me as a nice circle back to a way early page when they were coming up with the idea for the emulator. Copy the brain and anything from that point on will be different from the original. Brendan is finally understanding that instead of wishing for his lover back.